Short Story

Chocolate Killed My Best Friend (A Short Story)

It was September 15th, 2248. Three years after my freak pogostick accident(which is a story for another time) and my friend GlenCoco and I decided to use the time machine we had purchased from eBay.As we were leaving my white toy poodle, Killer, jumped in and knockedthe dial. We were then transported to the distant past.

Once we arrived we stepped outside, and it was a beautiful sight. Thesky was crystal clear since it had not been polluted by humans forthousands of years. The landscape was a beautiful desert plain, andwhile Killer was sniffing around, I noticed a cave.

I asked Glen "Do you want to go into the cave?". He replied, "What ev'".

We slowly approached the huge cave, once we stepped in I was startledto see two cave people standing there. There was a male and a female.The male was about 3 foot tall, and had a 2 foot long beard, he wouldcontinually beat his head with his wooden club. The female was clothedin the latest tiger skin wear.We could not communicate but we soonfound a common interest, Disco. One thing most people do not know isthat Disco is an ancient art form traced back to recivilization.Luckily, I had brought a battery operated Disco Ball and batteries. Wetaught them many new dance moves such as the 'hustle' and the'robot'.Killer was particularly good at the 'robot'.

Glen eventually gotten tired from "shaking his groove thang", anddecided to eat one of his chocolate bars he brought along. This was not smartsince everyone knows lions are attracted to chocolate. A lion almostinstantaneously appeared. When he roared it sounded like a cow mooing.Glen laughed, and then the lion started chasing us.We ran out of the cave and darted back to the time machine. The lion kept gaining on us so I grabbed one of Glen's chocolate bars and threwit in the opposite direction. Glen yelled "No!", and leapt for the chocolate bar. I yelled out to him"Don't do it", but it was too late.

My best friend was dead. He was then immediately mauled and killed bythe lion. Killer and I then went to the time machine to get away fromthe lion. After we transported back to 2248, we had a funeral for Glen.His gravestone read, "He died for the thing he loved most, Chocolate".

Pimp Chronicles

Part 1: PIMPZ
christhewalrus01: sup holmes
ArcticMonkeys33: not much flirting with the ladies, ya know haha; you?
christhewalrus01: oh
christhewalrus01: just setting up a date
christhewalrus01: you know
ArcticMonkeys33: haha sweet, and I dont know
ArcticMonkeys33: haha
christhewalrus01: seriously...you always catch me when i'm setting something up with the ladies
ArcticMonkeys33: haha, I know
ArcticMonkeys33: your just so much of a pimp that your always setting stuff up
Part II: Realization
ArcticMonkeys33: haha your such a pimp
christhewalrus01: uhm...well...i mean, pimp means multiple girls
christhewalrus01: i only have 1
ArcticMonkeys33: woah, only one?? what happened to you?
christhewalrus01: soooo
christhewalrus01: i really like this girl
christhewalrus01: she's great

And so a Pimp turns good, TT on the otherhand is still BIG PIMPIN' haha

Nerd Battles; LOTR V. Star Wars

jmurt6: oh get real
jmurt6: the return of the king is the greatest
ArcticMonkeys33: no Return of the Jedi; kicks its ass!
jmurt6: hmm sorry i disagree fully
jmurt6: and the fact that orlando bloom is in lotr helps out with the whole liking of the movie situation... it only adds to its greatness haha
ArcticMonkeys33: but please admit that Sam and Frodo are totally gay for each other
ArcticMonkeys33: its so obvious
jmurt6: oh come on they are best friends
ArcticMonkeys33: and Dildo Baggins
jmurt6: and sam gets married at the end!
ArcticMonkeys33: GAY!
jmurt6: to a girl!
jmurt6: be nice tt.
ArcticMonkeys33: haha its actually Frodo in drag

Chris Emo Picture

Emo Chris!

Rose

My friends cousin took this picture; I think its beautiful.