The Legend of: Gary Nagle

ArcticMonkeys33: almost as cool as gary
OdtherChris: almost
OdtherChris: so close
ArcticMonkeys33: i know
ArcticMonkeys33: he is what every perfectionist aims for, he makes it look so easy to be that awesome
OdtherChris: i know thats freaking insane i dont know how he does it
ArcticMonkeys33: yeah he truly is the 8th world wonder
OdtherChris: brilliant
ArcticMonkeys33: when i grow up i want to be like gary, doesn't every little boy say that.
OdtherChris: yeah i said that and i didnt even know who gary was
ArcticMonkeys33: yep, then you met him and your dreams all became clear.
OdtherChris: yeah it was like OMGsh
ArcticMonkeys33: Yeah when i first saw him and saw how perfect he was, i walked up to him and i said, "are you gary?" and he replied, "you got any mountain dew?"
OdtherChris: so badass
ArcticMonkeys33: i know!
OdtherChris: yeah and did he have his leg kick up agaisnt the wall troo
ArcticMonkeys33: yeah! I was like "he really is the second-coming of Fonzie, except without the STDs"
OdtherChris: hey Garys' cool he gets the ladies i wouldnt be so sure that he doesnt have a few STDs
ArcticMonkeys33: yeah, but he is smart. He only dates virgins, after one date he gets rid of that trailer trash for another virgin. He's been through 200 chicks
OdtherChris: not only is he a badass but hes a smart bastard
ArcticMonkeys33: Thats gary for you, he could get any girl he wants
OdtherChris: even one thats actually a male prostitute
ArcticMonkeys33: he has got it all, good looks, ladies, money, brains, diabetes
OdtherChris: and a brand new pair of swimming trunks
OdtherChris: hes got it all

Google’s Office Suite Complete: Google “PowerPoint” Confirmed

There’s no need for further speculation: Google CEO Today at the Web 2.0 Expo Google CEO Eric Schmidt confirmed that Google will soon launch a PowerPoint clone, completing their basic office suite (they already have Word and Excel covered).



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Terrible Songs Volume 1:

Cupids Chokehold by Gym Class heroes
First they still basically the whole song from the Super Tramp classic "Breakfast In America"; and the rapping is horrendous... Also it is from their first album, and when you can't even write original music for your first album it is just pathetic....

Now Compare this shittiness:

To this Classic:

It's a pathetic rip-off.

Indiana Time Zone

ArcticMonkeys33: Is Indiana a different time zone?
christhewalrus01: um
christhewalrus01: i dont know
ArcticMonkeys33: hah
ArcticMonkeys33: GOOGLE IT!
christhewalrus01: no
ArcticMonkeys33: i did
christhewalrus01: thats in the form of a question
christhewalrus01: that would be a jeeves equation there
ArcticMonkeys33: oh my god
ArcticMonkeys33: 74 coutnies in Indiana are in the Eastern Time Zone; 18 are in the Central Time Zone; and shes gone so we can't ask her which part she is in!
christhewalrus01: damnit!
ArcticMonkeys33: its the only state like that too
ArcticMonkeys33: out of all the damn states....Indiana!
christhewalrus01: damn
ArcticMonkeys33: theres 49 other ones! and Austrailia too
christhewalrus01: well which county is IU in
christhewalrus01: or does it like
ArcticMonkeys33: lets find out
christhewalrus01: share two counties
ArcticMonkeys33: to ask.com!
ArcticMonkeys33: its in the city of Bloomington
ArcticMonkeys33: now to find out where the hell that is
christhewalrus01: hahaha
ArcticMonkeys33: to wikipedia!
christhewalrus01: ahhh
ArcticMonkeys33: hahaha
christhewalrus01: wikipedia is great
ArcticMonkeys33: i keep on getting "bloomington and monroe county"
christhewalrus01: they have a great article on marijuana
ArcticMonkeys33: it is
ArcticMonkeys33: haha
ArcticMonkeys33: I found it on wiki
ArcticMonkeys33: FUN FACT!
ArcticMonkeys33: Bloomington is the 7th largest city in Indiana.
christhewalrus01: hahaha
ArcticMonkeys33: Monroe County
ArcticMonkeys33: now to find it out
ArcticMonkeys33: Eastern
ArcticMonkeys33: so we have the same time zone
ArcticMonkeys33: wow all that work for "same time zone"
christhewalrus01: yeah
christhewalrus01: thats...
christhewalrus01: really weird.

Valentine Day

christhewalrus01: too damn much cuddling
ArcticMonkeys33: damn you
ArcticMonkeys33: this is my 14/14 Valentine Day alone
ArcticMonkeys33: you've prob. had a date since you were 3 on Valentines Day
christhewalrus01: :-)
christhewalrus01: well the honey rode the bus home
christhewalrus01: and no parents were here when i got home...
ArcticMonkeys33: woah!
christhewalrus01: but all she wanted to do was cuddle
christhewalrus01: i was like "this is our chance! ahh"
ArcticMonkeys33: damn!
christhewalrus01: and then she fell asleep
christhewalrus01: so
ArcticMonkeys33: I would die for a cuddle
ArcticMonkeys33: well not really
christhewalrus01: my arm went numb
ArcticMonkeys33: I would kill a man for a cuddle; thats more like it
christhewalrus01: are you implying that you would like to cuddle with a man?
ArcticMonkeys33: NO!
ArcticMonkeys33: A woman; not you
ArcticMonkeys33: and not a fugly woman
christhewalrus01: hahaha
ArcticMonkeys33: a woman of my choosing...
christhewalrus01: fat chicks?
ArcticMonkeys33: they gotta pay
ArcticMonkeys33: but no
christhewalrus01: ahahaha
christhewalrus01: TT...you're choices are either fat..or unibrows and facial hair

ArcticMonkeys33: i'm keeping my streak of being single on valentines day alive! If i get a girlfriend by next year ill dump her before V-day so i can keep the streak going
BxFRED 10: =l
BxFRED 10: hahah
BxFRED 10: thats mean
ArcticMonkeys33: no; its for the record!
ArcticMonkeys33: THE RECORD!
ArcticMonkeys33: see the smart guys break up with girls around these days: Valentines Day, Christmas, and their Birthday because less gifts mean more $ for the guy
BxFRED 10: omg. thats not right
BxFRED 10: at all
ArcticMonkeys33: or is it so right its wrong?
ArcticMonkeys33: your right its just wrong
BxFRED 10: haha
BxFRED 10: it is
BxFRED 10: and really mean
ArcticMonkeys33: yes; I would never do that

ArcticMonkeys33: BOO!
emm x3 xo: AHHHH!!!!
ArcticMonkeys33: Oh and to a lesser extent happy valentines day even though I don't care how your day went
ArcticMonkeys33: i'm sure it went great without a hitch
emm x3 xo: hahah happy valentines day to you too
ArcticMonkeys33: yes; yet it wasn't so happy
emm x3 xo: awwwe why
ArcticMonkeys33: well actually it was great since my streak is still going strong! 14/14 Valentines Day alone which goes with my record of 15/15 years alone unless I get a date in 3 days
emm x3 xo: awwe poor tt
ArcticMonkeys33: no i'm not poor; I made 25 bucks today
ArcticMonkeys33: I only had to waste about 2 hours of my life shoveling! well more like 3 since I had to shovel my house about 4 times
emm x3 xo: awwe
ArcticMonkeys33: no that is a "Way to go TT; now you have money for the date you won't get!"; hah its fun making fun of myself; its so easy!
emm x3 xo: hahah tt.. no need to make fun of yourself :-)
ArcticMonkeys33: Oh yes there is a need; Since i've been out of things to talk about to you since 7th grade and this is the only way we can talk!
emm x3 xo: haha okayy
ArcticMonkeys33: like Oh My GAWD
emm x3 xo: OmGsH. Tt Is FrEaKiN aWeSoMe!
ArcticMonkeys33: don't lie
emm x3 xo: cHyEh. No LiE!
ArcticMonkeys33: Well i'll lie; Katie is the coolest and prettiest girl in the world
ArcticMonkeys33: now you can take out the lie part; and you can tell people I called you the coolest and prettiest girl in the world!
emm x3 xo: hahah

Our School Sucks

9:00- I arrive at the busstop
9:05- I start to get arritated that the bus hasn't arrived
9:10- I start to get cold; People compaining
9:15- 5 people leave.
9:20- I leave
9:37- The bus finally arrives 37 minutes late; and my whole busstop misses it.
Talk about a quality job our school district does. Seriously, I waited in freezing weather for 20 minutes. Great Job!

Script Part 1

Stud Muffin: The True Life Story of Chris Langguth(and how he gets laid)

(View pans to hospital bed)
Chris' Mom: *grunting*
Various Medical Personnel: Push, push, push!
Chris' Mom: AHH!
Doctor: It's a boy but it seems something is wrong; It seems his penis is bigger than mine.
Chris' Mom: But your chinese silly; even my penis is bigger than yours and I'm a woman!
Doctor: I forgot, what are you going to name him?
Chris' Mom: Christopher Stud Muffin Langguth
Baby Chris: That's Me!
(Show Opening Screen)
Chris Langguth as Christopher Stud Muffin Langguth
Tyler Treese as The loyal sidekick who has never had a girlfriend
Some chick as Hannah Wineland
Adam Smith as The dude who uses funny one-liners
(Cut to C.W. Longer Elementary School)
Chris Narrating: It was my first day in C.W. Longer Elementary and I knew it meant one thing: New Ladies to wow. I met my two fellow struggling pimps Tyler Treese and Adam Smith. Now Adam had the hots for a girl named Sarah and asked her out everyday during recess.
(Shows Adam at the swingsets)
Adam: Hey; I may not be Fred Flinstone but I can sure make your bedrock!
Sarah: No.
(Cuts to Adam talking to Chris and TT)
Adam: I really thought I had a chance this time; That line was genius.
Chris: Well you have to be smooth like I am; Watch this.
(Chris walks over to a table full of women he sets his eyes on a girl named Hannah Wineland)
Chris: Hey foxy momma, how about you and me go back to my place; I have my own teeter totter and I could teeter your totter if you know what I mean.
Hannah: Yes; umm I'll see you around at recess; bye, wait what is your name?
Chris: You can call me Sex Master or Chris.